Pleasing God in S*x

Good Morning Graduates.  Congratulations on your accomplishment and praise God for giving you strength and whatever else was necessary to bring you through years of study, tests…work & stress.  This morning I’d like to read an entire chapter of Scripture and ask you to follow along:  

Finally, then, brothers, we ask and urge you in the Lord Jesus, that as you received from us how you ought to walk and to please God, just as you are doing, that you do so more and more. ² For you know what instructions we gave you through the Lord Jesus. ³ For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; ⁴ that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, ⁵ not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; ⁶ that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you. ⁷ For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. ⁸ Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.

⁹ Now concerning brotherly love you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love one another, ¹⁰ for that indeed is what you are doing to all the brothers throughout Macedonia. But we urge you, brothers, to do this more and more, ¹¹ and to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, ¹² so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one.

¹³ But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. ¹⁴ For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. ¹⁵ For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. ¹⁶ For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. ¹⁷ Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. ¹⁸ Therefore encourage one another with these words.

The big truth in this chapter emerges right at the beginning: Is it possible, and you should, please God by the way you conduct yourselves.  And you should aim for this more and more.  Eternal God can be displeased, pleased, even more pleased, greatly pleased…with how we order our thinking and actions.  As someone said in a mid 20^th century sermon: how amazing that we – dust as we are – can be an ingredient in the divine happiness.  There’s a big picture goal for your life: to please God. 

In our chapter today, we’re presented with three specific avenues toward pleasing God.  I’d like to consider these three in three sermons directed to grads.  We please God (or not), by the way we: 

1. Approach sex
2. Approach work
3. Approach death

First, let’s just notice how fundamental those subjects are: sex, work, death.  What could be more basic to our present human existence?  Our transformation in Christ reaches to the depths. 

This morning we’ll look at the first of these:

VV 2-3: For you know the instructions we gave you through the Lord Jesus.  For this is the will of God…that you abstain from sexual immorality.  Paul reminds them that they’ve heard this teaching from him before, when he first came to Thessalonica bringing the gospel to them.  Spelling that out: from the start of their life in Christ they were urged toward a certain sexual ethic.  The topic was essential enough to be treated toward the beginning of learning how to follow Christ.  

And if you know about the Greco-Roman world, it was at least as sex-drenched and sexually weird as ours.  And to the brand-new disciples of Christ living in this debauched culture, the message was not, well, of course you’re going to do what everyone else is doing, or even try to be a little better, but rather something groundbreaking and resolute: abstain from sexual immorality.

What is meant by sexual immorality?  We can summarize the Scripture’s teachings: Any acts or fantasies of sex – not limited to, but up to and including sexual intercourse – that are committed or entertained outside the marriage covenant.  In the 21^st century we should add marriage between a man and a woman.  Ok, biological man and biological woman.    

This firm boundary in sex lies at the heart of our renewed, reborn relationship to God, Paul says in v.3.  This is the will of God, even your sanctification.  By sanctification he means the status of those in Christ as distinctly God’s, set apart for His use.  Meaning that there’s a direct link between Christ’s teaching on sex and our identity as redeemed holy ones who are living before a holy God.  

What could he mean by saying that our sexual practices reflect our theological identity?  Well, think about it:  At the heart of our theology is a righteous God whom we trust.  A God who operates not in gray space, who acts chaotically or disorderly, but operates steadfastly within covenants.  A God of definition and order and boundaries.  

Furthermore, our in Christ understanding of human creatures is that they are imago Dei – the image of God – and thus humans are unique among the creation, highly valuable, even sacred.  And – one last highlight of our theology – from our failure and breach of faith we’ve been brought back to the Creator through the shed blood of Jesus Christ who died for us. 

The theme running through our theological understanding is SIGNIFICANCE.  We’re in a situation where we’re the closest creature to the Creator of all who Himself is a righteous God, humans are in fact a unique creation, made in God’s likeness to reflect Him, and it’s the precious blood of the greatest Man who has walked this planet that has brought you back to God and life and wholeness  –  – ho-li-ness.  All this is wonderful.

And sex – which has something to do with nakedness and uncovering the secret of humans, with the creation of more image bearers, with  our maleness and femaleness reflecting the original community of the Holy Trinity of the righteous God, with mirroring the relationship between Christ and the Church he has redeemed with His precious blood – points to all these wonders.

Abstaining from sexual immorality, then, isn’t something trivial.  Or arbitrary.  Rather, it makes sense, it is coherent with our status as holy ones.  

In our sanctification, then, there’s a broad basis for approaching persons carefully – every aspect of them – bodies and desires and reproduction: thoughtfully, under the guidance of God’s Spirit, reverently.  You have never met an ordinary mortal, someone once pointed out.  

As you think through your whole situation, your sanctification, as it’s seen through the revelation of Jesus Christ, you should arrive, must arrive, at the perspective that sexual acts and thoughts are SIGNIFICANT, pointing to wonderful things.  Thus, it’s all to be cordoned off as holy ground, bounded by rules: reserved only for your spouse with whom you’ve made a lifelong commitment in the presence of God and in the sight of witnesses.  Abstain from sexual immorality.

Here’s a really helpful sentence: Each one of you [should] know how to control his own body…  from the context he obviously means control himself sexually.  Each…his own body.  In several ways every individual is unique.  So, instead of tossing out some general techniques for how people avoid sexual immorality and live in holiness and honor, Paul tells individuals to figure it out for him or herself.  

You have your own background, your own peculiar habits of managing stress, your body reacts to the lunar and solar and weather rhythms in specific and unique ways.  What turns on or trips up one person might be ho-hum for someone else.  One’s sexual desire isn’t like another’s: one might be driven by an animal lust or a curiosity about how people tick or this longing to be admired and held or wanting to take a particular relationship to the next serious step asap.  

So…know thyself.  Is lack of sleep the trigger?  Digging into the lives of famous entertainers?  On Wall Street Journal the article headline is Daring Fashion at the Met Gala – and you think, Wall Street Journal and High Culture – surely I’ll be safe around that!  Eating a bunch of chocolate?  In the wake of bad news?  

While each of us needs to figure out how to control himself, I do think we can lay down one absolute: throughout your life stay away from pornography.  That’s a dead-end deadener from the realm of the dead and damned taking you and your relationships and your peace and your brain and your health down down down.  Don’t let anyone trick you about that.  Generally speaking, unless you’re in medicine or a caregiver, the only two people you should see naked – in real life or on screens – are yourself and your spouse.  

Notice that we’re each supposed to learn about how to direct our sexual selves in holiness and honor.  Which returns us to ideas around your sanctification.  Abstaining from sexual immorality – that is, for example, when you refuse to ogle a person or enter into sexual banter with someone in the hopes that the flirtation will go somewhere – you abstain NOT because you’re keeping some arbitrary rule:  For some reason God doesn’t like this piece of your flesh to touch this piece of this person’s flesh.  

No, this is about holiness!  Holiness is the word for the place where life is concentrated, where energy has gathered together.  The image of holiness isn’t a sterilized hospital room but a burning bush!  Holiness isn’t the absence of or stiffness or stodginess or anything connoting low energy.  Holiness is about life.  LIFE!  

Since we talked about police dogs last Wednesday I’ll continue the analogy.  Think about a dog that is out of control, bites people, runs away, is skittish.  All you can do with those animals is tie them up, lock them away, keep them from life. 

But now picture a dog riding in the K9 car, walking at heel next to the policeman as together they investigate, chasing down the bad guy, launching himself at his arm, bringing him down.  There’s life!  Power!  Purpose!  

And what’s the difference between these two dogs?  Training!  Control!  Discipline!  

Christ’s teachings on sex are not to restrict your life, to bring you into death.  But Christ’s word and sacrament and Spirit are setting you up so you can have life and have it abundantly.  For holiness.  

Imagine you’ve trained yourself in sexual self control.  You’ve fought your impatient flesh, you and your future spouse have made no provision to fulfill lusts, and waited until your wedding night… and then throughout your marriage you are faithful in body and mind to your spouse.  Why, you are living in an enchanted world, a world where there’s mystery and expectation and delight and joy and satiety…and then throughout your life confidence and focus and progress and unencumbered-ness and peace.  Life.  Holiness!  

And then honor.  Control his own body in…honor.  Paul and I have been talking about this – in some ways we as moderns are very arrogant.  But perhaps more profoundly we’re the opposite of arrogant.  We’ve stopped taking ourselves or anybody seriously.  The worldview that is commonly relayed to us is that we are a clump of cells which have accidentally come together and we’re drifting through empty space with other cell clumps on a planet that might be getting warmer but whose end is cold death.  So, at least ultimately, life is pointless.  All that counts is experiences we can collect for ourselves: 15 minutes of fame or rushes of pleasure or something else just as shallow.  

So, as this worldview influences sex, the thought goes something like this: into this boring pointlessness let’s make things interesting but actually with as little effort as possible.  Let’s be naughty.  Transgressive.  Look at me juicily.  Show me your stuff.  Or…spend time thinking back on other exciting, transgressive scenes.  

So, at the pointlessness we throw cheap thrills – but that’s the thing: it’s all so tawdry and cheap.  Going after attention – especially through bodily exposure or through filthy or otherwise sexually charged banter – is cheap.   

But here’s the thing: you’re not cheap.  You are the world’s lords! This world is made for your enjoyment!  You are created as an image bearer.  The One of Whom you bear the image is a beautiful, eternal, blessed Creator.  You’ve been bought back from death and hell with the precious blood of Christ.  You will judge angels.  From start to finish, God is taking you seriously.  

So, no need to construct significance out of pointlessness.  Nothing is pointless.  So, don’t show off, don’t go for thrills, don’t handle your urges and drives like those who don’t know these things, who haven’t been taught, who don’t know God.

Then, in v. 6 Paul provides one more perspective: we are not to wrong our brother, which we would if we were not controlling our body in holiness and honor, if we didn’t abstain from sexual immorality.  What does Paul mean by saying that the sexually immoral believer wrongs his brother?  Well, if you ran off with a church member’s spouse, that would certainly be wronging him.  Don’t do that.  

But I think Paul has something other than that specific situation in mind.  When a believer in Christ is sexually immoral, since he is Spiritually joined to others in the Body of Christ, that Body of Christ is negatively affected, and every brother and sister in it is wronged. 

And when someone attacks Christ’s Body He springs into action!  The Lord of vengeance won’t stand by when members of His body are hurt, even if they don’t know why they’re hurting, or even that that they’re hurting.  Meaning, your life will be helped… or hindered by Christ according to your faithfulness to Christ’s rules on sex.  Much of the quality of your life will be related to your obedience to Christ’s teaching on sex.  

For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. ⁸ Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.

Graduates, maybe it’s a strange charge to you as you turn into a new corridor of life.  But sex is a great, good thing.  And like several wonderful things, it’s also powerful and potentially dangerous.  Handle it in the fear of God under the direction of Christ.  Did you notice that all three Persons of the Holy Trinity showed up in this paragraph…about sex?!?  Which means, don’t think of or act toward sex in a godless way, as if God were irrelevant to this whole discussion, but rather just as you make it your aim to please Him in everything, make it your aim to please the Triune God in how you approach sex.